You are currently browsing the daily archive for August 15, 2018.
I now truly understand. I understand fatigue. I understand the doctor’s, “you will know it when it hits”. I understand that you really can’t possibly understand.
I can’t move. I can’t breath. I can’t think. I can’t get out of bed. I can’t even contemplate moving. I have thoughts and plans and desires but can’t seem to… Hours go by.
Its not sleep I need. Its not drugs I need. Its.. well once I figure that out, I will return.
The basket of little candy bits was missing today. Where is my reward? Is it gone because too many people came thru the office looking for sustenance? A health craze? Heaven forbid, the cancer patient needs to eat healthy. Do I now need to bring my own? Don’t they understand that it really is the little things, right now, that help keep sanity on the rise?
I want my candy treat.
Yesterday, I was a walking disaster. Things took it upon themselves to drop, fall, slid, and just run away from me. I caught a box eyeing my shins. Keys fell out of the car unto the pavement. Drinks actually bounced on the floor. Made for spectacular arcs of color across the kitchen walls. Lids landed icky-side down every time. It was getting to be very disturbing.
So far today, it’s only been the missing chocolate fix.
Thoughts of an Old Fart 