Thoughts of an Old Fart

“The family is all here.”

“How’s it going?”

“Baby boy is fine. He’s the cutest. He’s a big 7lbs 14 oz. Good set of lungs too. They let me hold him for a while.”

“How’s Mom?”

“She lost kidney function. But she’s not bleeding as much. Oh, she raised her arms. We took a few pictures of her and the baby.”

“You know how much she hates that. If that doesn’t wake her up, nothing will. It’s weird. I keep praying and then I yell at her. Over and over…”

“Me too. She has to wake up for this beautiful boy. I keep telling her over and over.”

“Keep me in the loop.”

“Will do.”

“Pray.”

“Anything?”

“Um.. They didn’t think she would make it through the night. Her heart stopped twice. She went through 20 pints of blood. She’s bleeding from everywhere. They’re worried about neurological damage and they think they know what’s happening.”

“Do I want to know?”

“Let me find the paper. It’s something called Amniotic Fluid Embolism.”

“Aw shit. I googled it. This is bad, very bad. Beyond bad.”

“If you got any in with any deity, use it.”

“What?! Oh crap what?”

“They had to do an emergency hysterectomy. They can’t stop the bleeding. They say she may not make it through the night. They’ve called the family.”

“Oh shit.. How does this happen? She was just in my cube complaining cause her boss wanted her to go home, take it easy, and she never felt better. She was munching on my peanut m’n’m’s and complaining that Junior was doing flips using her bladder as a springboard.”

“It’s looking bad. But Junior is improving. They think he’ll be fine.”

“Hey… anything.. let me know..”

“Shit. Oh Shit.”

“What?!

“She …um.. she’s.. Oh shit. She and the baby went into distress. They did an emergency C-section. The babie’s heart stopped. But they think he’s going to make it. He’s in the NICU.”

“What about her?!”

“It’s not good. She went into cardiac arrest. She was gone for 17 minutes. They don’t know what happened. But its not looking good for her. Her boss called and thought I would want to know. I thought you would want to know.”

“Oh shit.”

“Yeah.. If you hear anything, call.”

“If you hear anything call.”

“Well hell. Have you heard anything yet?”

“No.”

“What? I’m gona go talk to her boss.”

….

“He said that last he knew she was in labor. He said he would call with status.”

“Keep me in the loop.”

“Will do.”